this post was submitted on 30 May 2026
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The cool thing about the postal service is that they will deliver anything no questions asked.
Top bun from a McDonald's hamburger? no problem!
Asbestos condoms? You got it!
Several slices of 9 year old moldy balogna? Hell yeah buddy!
Having shipped packages via USPS before, I cannot confirm they don't ask questions, they specifically asked to make sure I wasn't shipping chemicals or explosives.
I know it means hazardous chemicals, but I find the idea of "does your package contain molecules" chuckle-worthy. Probably something a surreal world post office would say.
Were the bologna and the asbestos condoms at any point related?
The asbestos condoms keep your shlonger safe from all the gross stuff on the balogna when you stuff it into a toilet paper tube to bake a makeshift fleshlight.