The Onion

(New York) As today’s court hearings were held for suspected shooter Luigi Mangioni in the case involving the death of a healthcare executive, an injury related to the case was reported at the prison where he is held. Three boxes of women’s underwear reportedly fell from a high shelf in the undergarments section of the warehouse housing items mailed to the defendant, causing “a mild concussion” to one of the guards in the area. Prosecutors say Mangioni may also be charged for the guard’s injuries in the trial.

“We get it,” said one guard from the facility. “He’s smoking hot. But when you mail him your underwear, you don’t think about the damage you can cause.”

“Also, the smell,” he added.

Mangioni had been held without bail for over a year since his arrest, and fans have been sending support ever since. The prison has hired two staffers to handle marriage proposals, along with housing two warehouses of assorted “gifts” to the alleged murderer.

The injured guard, identified as Leo Sturbgetter, was treated at a local hospital and released.