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I don't know whether to upvote you for accuracy, or downvote you for obnoxiousness
Sitting on the fence is a weak stance. I am literally shaking right now reading you are comfortable with arriving atop that position so sharply. The only fair action wood be to post your beaming support and fall on the right side of it. It’s clear that everyone on the left side is not on the right side, you can only ever be on one side at any one time and nothing you can say otherwise is a valid defence against what everyone else has hammered on tooth and nail. Pivoting or hinging your bets to be able to swing freely is latching onto false security and like agate - ornamental. You clearly must brace yourself and picket a side, cementing your footing so you do not go around paling in comparison to others who are railing around with more electrified boundaries of what they are willing to uphold. May your shaded post and foundations rot in the rainy hell you have chosen to exist.
8.5/10
Brevity is the soul of wit. Even if you're going for bloviating, it could have been a bit more compact.
I did get a Terry Pratchett vibe, so you're certainly on the right track