Been learning for well over a year now, this was my second attempt. I got 6 faults :)

It’s a modern miracle

Can't believe I managed to bag the username david!

Tip: join feddit.uk while the good usernames are still spare! Thanks @[email protected]

Ok fine I'll start. Got married recently, it was about as stressful and mortifying as any such form of public performance, so I'd made my new husband agree we could get a Greggs immediately after the ceremony to stop me feeling sick.

We rocked up into the queue as a party of ten, me still holding a ridiculous bouquet, most of our friends looking self-conscious in their wedding finery.

Woman at the till gave us our cheese savoury stotties for free by way of congratulations, and the guy working in the back claimed it was the "Northernest thing" he'd ever seen. I have never been more proud.

(worked a treat to settle my nervy stomach for the rest of the day, as well)