Thanks, that's good to know. I set up the hanssonit vm - it was very easy to start off with, but it does things differently to the AIO. The AIO didn't exist when I started out, but I'll look into migrating at some point. It's a fairly large install, so slightly fretful.
liquidambar
I quite like Nextcloud with Talk (spreed), but it's a whole cloud suite. Nextcloud is E2EE, and NC Talk does text, voice, and video. The phone apps are nice too. The only problem is connecting more than 2-3 people in a voice/video call can be a bit much, so they recommend a high-performance backend (either a paid service, or annoying to set up yourself). It might be overkill if you don't also use Nextcloud's other applications, but I use a lot of them extensively, especially when feeding CalDav calendars etc into Home Assistant. Friends making an account on your nextcloud is pretty trivial, even for people who aren't technical. I use the VM hooked to dedyn io for outside access, and it was all very easy to set up. I've had it running for about 6 years now, and only had a problem updating for a while, but it was resolved by the community forums.
600+ automations, 500+ scripts :( My house runs itself, and has its own moods. If it's in a goth persona and feeling miserable (which it usually is when in a goth persona), it'll change some of the light colors to apocalypse of blood.