DankOfAmerica

I've been taking dexmethyl extended release for a bit with no problems. Works great. We decided to tray a higher dose. To do so, we needed pills with smaller doses rather than one huge one. That caused me to change pharmacies due to availability. Same medication, different pharmacy.

1st day

• Same dose as before, just in several smaller dosed pills.
• A bit tired in the afternoon. I stay in my room. I get take out.

2nd day

• 10 mg more than regular
• I drive out to town. On the way back, I feel like I couldn't care about anything. I had to repeat to myself in my head what I wanted to say for like a min before saying it. I stop at Costco and everyone felt like floating entities in a universe-sea that I was swim-walking through. It was like I was playing a very realistic 1st-person Grand Theft Auto, except I'm not a psychopathic car thief and serial killer; instead, I ate a slice of pizza and got some Ensures. Coming back home, I stop to get a coffee to help with the drive home. I was alert and aware, just distracted. I stay in my room the rest of the day. Don't feel like cooking, so I get take out.

3rd day

• 10 mg more than regular
• I don't do anything productive. I tried to watch TV around noon, but couldn't pay attention. I remember thinking, "That guy is saying something. I wonder if it's important." I am freezing all day. I take 2-3 hot showers just to warm up. I came to ask a question on Lemmy and completely forgot what it was. I ended up playing Age of Empires 2 for like 6 hours and lost all but one match. The one I didn't lose was cause my team won it. I literally only contributed 2 trebuchets.

4th day (today)

• 20 mg more than regular
• 45 mins after taking, I am straight up hallucinating. The walls start becoming even more 3d (lol); there are layers now. The patterns I just saw somewhere else in the room are transposed on top of what I am currently looking at. The colors fluctuate in intensity from colorful to black & white. Everything feels far away. My senses don't feel connected. Visuals and audio were two separate worlds independent of each other. I could hear silence. Silence has a sound, y'all! Doing something like showering seemed like a mission, so I didn't do it. I am freezing cold, wearing an undershirt, a long-sleeve shirt, two hoodies, long johns, sweat pants, and socks...all indoors and it's like 65°F in here.
• Luckily, I was scheduled to meet with the doctor. He took notes, and asked if the bottle lists the manufacturer. I looked at the bottle twice as best as I could and respond that it doesn't. He asks me to show him the bottle and he spots it in a second. He said it's likely the generic manufacturer. He told me to keep track of generics that I have adverse events with and to notify the pharmacy so they don't give it to me again. I'm going back to the previous dose, pharmacy, and manufacturer.

Edit: I'm gonna have to make edits as I notice typos

Relevant video: https://youtu.be/VDqsHl3lBlA

Explanation: Many conspiracy theories argue that the CIA had or let JFK get assassinated, in part, for saying he wanted to, "Splinter the CIA into a thousand pieces and scatter it into the winds." About a week ago, Trump has pushed to get all a list of all FBI agents that worked on the Jan 6 case in any manner in order to fire them. This includes high-level agents. More recently, the FBI announced that they found 2,400 new JFK assassination records.

My 28-hours circadian cycle jacks me up. I am dragging ass in the morning. I will get up at 5:30 with the Sun and not do anything beside doom scroll for hours. I might get up to brush my teeth around 9:00, maybe start living the day around 11:00. This is with meds. I'm trying to start a morning routine that gets me going. The basic tasks are:

1. Have something planned to look forward to
2. Wake up same time everyday with curtains open for light
3. Make the bed
4. Brush teeth
5. Morning check in with a friend
6. Positive/enjoyable morning activities

It is at #6 where I could use some help because everything besides laying down in quiet with headphones on and looking at pointless superficial stuff on the internet seems like it is too much effort. Food is repulsive in the morning, so no breakfast. I also need to be near a restroom for the first few hours in the mornings. Any recommendations?

Like autistic people get to be autistic. That's a word, and it has meaning. Someone can be autistic because it's a type of person (spectrumy type). In my opinion, ADHD sucks as an identifying term. It's 3 letters, one repeated. It means nothing as it is spelled and can't be owned as an identity because they're letters, not a word. "I'm adhudd." The initials include "disorder" in it. That sucks. Autistic people don't go around saying, "Hi, I'm austically disordered," cause that's not accepting. Is there a term that is smooth and not judgmental for ADHD? Maybe we can take Aspergers since it got dropped, but add the 'd' to get "Adspergers". Nah, that's stupid af. What about multibrained? I feel multibrained because I act like I've got multiple brains running in my head doing their own thing all at the same time, and I bounce around them based on who knows what.

What? Oh, yes...I'll have the spaghetti bolog-knees. Do you guys have red pepper...crushed red pepper? Yeah, thanks. Cool. I like your name tag. Is that really your name? Samsquatch?...oh! It's Samuel, but you changed it to Samsquatch! I love Trailer Park Boys. Fuck off, Leahy! Yeah. Sorry. I got excited.

Okay. So...um, is there a descriptive word for ADHD that isn't ADHD?

A white background with an all black icon of a person with eyes closed, crying, and holding their right hand to the face. The caption reads:

I am chronically ill

daily I take pills

to keep climbing the hill

while engaging my skills

to help you get your fill

while I shitpost for thrills

It's like your looking at pictures of a kid you vaguely recognize but can even remember them. "Where do I know that kid from??"

There's the whole TikTok thing, talk about EV cars, and now DeepSeek. I know I've heard my own stuff too, but I want to see what other people are hearing and seeing?

I'm getting real sick of all this self-help advice giving vague instructions. Wtf does keeping someone accountable mean?? Do you run a sheet on social revenue and expenses? Imma need a flowchart with these please.

You somehow magically sense something there through your eyes, but you don't see it at all. It's stronger if you don't look at it directly and move your head about a little. It's like there's an unconscious observer reporting where things are, and you just take the info and acknowledge it, but you don't see it. Anyone else get this?