this post was submitted on 09 Mar 2025
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If I were to, hypothetically, want to weld my asshole shut, how should I go about doing this? Is it even possible? What might be the repercussions of doing this?

For context, I have zero experience in welding and the human anatomy so any help at all would be greatly appreciated.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

What might be the repercussions of doing this?

Oooh, absolutely nothing! No side effects whatsoever, it really improves your quality of life!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

No need to go poop anymore. It's definitely a big plus to not have an asterisk.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Where would the poo go? The only thing I can think of is that it would back up until it comes out your mouth. (Although I can think of a few people that talk shit, maybe that’s what happened).

I don’t think welding would work. You’d have to stitch it shut and wait for the flesh to grow together, which might take a few weeks. I don’t know if cauterisation would count as welding, and I don’t know if the seam would be strong enough to resist the back pressure. If it tears open due to said pressure, there’s also the risk of infection due to foreign matter entering the bloodstream.

Why don’t you start with a cork or a butt plug and see how well it works after the first twelve hours? Then if you like the result, apply superglue for a quick fix.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

Thanks, this was very helpful. I'll make sure to try this when I get the chance.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

Welding would not be an effective way to close your asshole.

Welding involves turning the existing materials to be affixed into a liquid by melting it, then resolidifying it such that both materials are bonded.

If you would try to weld your asshole, you are going to end up burning it instead. Should charred bits of your asshole become molten and bond, it is likely that those charred bits won't have a healthy bond to your unburnt skin, so the weld will fail quickly.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

I never thought I'd have any reason to share this link, but here we are. This woman had her anus removed...

https://youtube.com/watch?v=gXCbI2_pQfU

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

Superglue and laxatives may or may not have been used as a method of torture - so maybe it’s documented.