this post was submitted on 26 May 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


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1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

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Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

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-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

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all 36 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] Honytawk@discuss.tchncs.de 98 points 1 week ago (1 children)

At least finish it properly

[–] FosterMolasses@leminal.space 12 points 1 week ago

Lmao well done

[–] applebusch@lemmy.blahaj.zone 47 points 1 week ago (5 children)

hot take, all genitals are sexy if they're attached to someone im into

[–] Derpenheim@lemmy.zip 20 points 1 week ago (2 children)

If my girl had a dick Im learning how to gwuak, thats all Im sayin

[–] SharkWeek@lemmy.blahaj.zone 9 points 1 week ago

Aww, such a sweet thing to say!

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago

I hope your girl gets the dick of her dreams for both of your sakes bro. ❤️

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 18 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I mean, it's not that hot of a take...

[–] FosterMolasses@leminal.space 1 points 1 week ago

samesies lol

[–] imadethis@fedinsfw.app 5 points 1 week ago

The happiest bit I can play with is the smile on their face, or their eyes, if I can make them close as they groan in pleasure. Genitals pale in comparison, but are a good place to 'access' those other regions.

[–] GhostFace@lemmy.today 5 points 1 week ago

Assuming they've been taken care of.

[–] gh0stb4tz@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago
[–] Peacock@lemmy.zip 22 points 1 week ago

They call it 'bumpin uglies' for a reason.

[–] wreckedcarzz@lemmy.world 21 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Same but for tits.

Like you just got those hanging out like you're trying to contain the flood from hurricane Katrina or something? Why are they so gigantic? Why do guys lose all the blood from their brain when they see them?

...

a cute twink with a dick as thick and heavy it can be used for weight training 'umm uhhh um ggfsaerhiyvewvgtdf'

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago

Wait until they start spraying milk everywhere. What are you, a cow? Jesus, have a little self-respect.

[–] Gonzako@lemmy.world 12 points 1 week ago (1 children)

"Looks so weird"

-My first love right before giving her very first bj

[–] FosterMolasses@leminal.space 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Every lady I grew up with also thought this, but for whatever reason I never really had that experience. I don't know if I was already a little heathen at that age or what, but I remember 3 of us looking up pics on dial-up internet, my two friends going "Oh wow, it looks so weird!" "I think I'll just stick with girls honestly..." and I was over here like

"Haha, nice."

[–] Gonzako@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

i'll be honest, I also thought the same the first time I was eating her out. Tho, I had my mouth too busy to coment on it

[–] janus2@lemmy.zip 12 points 1 week ago (1 children)

that is approximately the face i made, and a few years later i realized I'm a lesbian lol

[–] LadyButterfly@reddthat.com 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Fellow queer girl representing!

[–] janus2@lemmy.zip 1 points 5 days ago

hell yeah 🏳️‍🌈

[–] daggermoon@piefed.world 8 points 1 week ago (2 children)

No one wants to see mine either.

[–] imadethis@fedinsfw.app 3 points 1 week ago (2 children)

I do, and if you're close enough for me to touch, I'll make sure you know that you're wanted.

[–] daggermoon@piefed.world 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] imadethis@fedinsfw.app 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I highly doubt you are my offspring. Quite illegal. Also, limits our options together.

[–] daggermoon@piefed.world 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] imadethis@fedinsfw.app 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Oooooh. Sorry, I'm a bit dense at times.

[–] daggermoon@piefed.world 5 points 1 week ago

That's alright.

[–] OwOarchist@pawb.social 1 points 1 week ago

o7

We need more heroes like you in the world.

[–] Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 week ago