Microblog Memes

Why?

Can you be well adjusted with only one or the other? Sure. But you’re going to have an easier time of things if you get proper interaction from both sexes as you grow up. It helps you know how to deal with them, makes you less nervous, and honestly there is just an inherent difference between how each acts.

That one isn't a "yank obsession". Fathers are important, as are mothers, and any child growing up with only one of them is going to have things they miss-out on.

BTW I'm not passing any judgement on single sex couples adopting, or any other shape of loving family. I don't know any data on what the outcomes are like, but I'm sure the most important thing is the love and support the child gets.

Just taking this one example under consideration, maybe the boy has expressed interest in fishing, and the mom knows that this neighbor is into fishing, and she emphatically isn't, and she feels like her son might benefit from that kind of bonding experience.

From a more broad-based perspective, it doesn't have to be a gendered conversation, but for a lot of young people, they look to adults for guidance and for ways to understand and express their gender, and it's healthy and helpful to have an adult that they can pattern their own gender expression off of. I didn't have a lot of present male role models as a young boy, and so I found myself reading and watching a lot of science fiction and asking myself "Is this the kind of thing that Captain Picard would do?" It wasn't a perfect replacement by a long shot, but it was something, and it was something that I didn't even fully realize I was looking for until I went back and looked at my own developing sense of what it was to be a man, much later in adulthood.

Can a child learn healthy gender expression from an adult of any given gender? I don't know, maybe. But I do know that as a boy, I really wanted an adult man to help me construct my own identity, and I went looking for one, without even fully knowing what I was doing or why.

Was raised with divorced parents, seeing my father only occasionally. I can see ways it's fucked me up - lacking confidence, typical "male" skills and I often had to face singular point of view of life when growing up. I didn't "feel" it making damage, because it didn't do that much - but I lost a lot of growth I'd otherwise had.

Also have female friend who had similiar situation and, at the same time, similiar outcome.

Children need both parents, simple as. Not only is raising a kid by yourself a horror for parent, it's also not enough for a child. Doesn't mean it will produce a psychopath or emotional wreck, but it will show up repeatedly after growing up, if done well only in small ways, but if not...welp.

And again, it's not about just lacking a father - IMO, both parental figures are needed.

I'm assuming that he's a friend of the neighbor lady, so he isn't really a random.

I understand what you are saying. There is often a sport role that everyone assumes dads and sons do too.

But part of that is even though we have moved past fixed gender roles our society still has age old things that are going to take time to blend out. For example my dad is a repair/fixit /hunting/fishing /sports guy from that gendered era. As a kid I really disliked team sports, so wed go fishing.. Just quality time and quiet reflection.

My mom was art and books, and baking. We had lots of intellectual discussions growing up...about morality, ethics etc. Quality time with my mom was her showing me how to sew, or sharing art.

The male role model, is showing positive influence...rather than negative toxic violence or fist fighting, etc. So that can still be hanging out fishing with a man...it doesn't have to be hangingout with dad and knitting.

Humans naturally try to mimic other people that are like them in their environment. Can boys become happy and decent humans without a male role model? Absolutely.

However, lots of studies have shown that a lack of good same sex role model usually have a negative impact on young people that lasts into adulthood.

And let's be real, fathers abandon their children a lot more than mothers, so that affects young boys a lot more than young girls.

Yo, also: “a whole generation is missing their fathers and growing up without them”

Why are they trying to prime culture with this “be a dad to everyone, especially the kids without a dad” thing? When clearly most kids have dads in the picture?

Almost like they’re going to die in a war or something.

BSA is not the only scouting org, and there are other ways to be a positive role model (such as volunteering for Big Brothers Big Sisters).

For all we know that male role model could also point him to the manosphere.

"Manosphere is because no fishing" is an astonishing take, care to back up the implied "children from single mothers turn to be more misogynistic" claim with some source?

No, with knives. He's going to throw the boy in there and tell him to catch a fish with the knife in his mouth, then stab it. He's only allowed to come out of the water with a stabbed fish, just like his own father used to do. Then they'll take turns stabbing the fish with their matching knives. It's a true bonding experience...unless the boy doesn't catch a fish. Then it's time to teach him about the belt, just like his own father used to do.

the hick traditional way
one of my great uncles legit did that to put food on the table lol