this post was submitted on 26 Feb 2026
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Give me your mum jokes!

top 41 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] TaterTot@piefed.social 5 points 6 days ago

Your mamma's so fat Ben Kenobi said: "That's no moon..... that's yo mamma!".

[–] Etterra@discuss.online 4 points 1 week ago

Yo momma so ugly that Cronenberg cast her in a movie.

[–] DrunkAnRoot@sh.itjust.works 2 points 6 days ago

yo momma so old she went to school with a t-rex

[–] ruko24@programming.dev 2 points 6 days ago

Yo momma so fat, she cut her finger and gravy came out

[–] Zagam@piefed.social 3 points 6 days ago

Yo momma so fat when the weather man said it was chilly outside she ran out with a spoon.

[–] tatterdemalion@programming.dev 2 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

Your momma's so fat, she got shot with a tranquilizer dart when the hippos escaped from the zoo.

[–] flambonkscious@sh.itjust.works 2 points 6 days ago (1 children)

What the hell is going on with the scale in this graph?

Please explain.

[–] Berengaria_of_Navarre@lemmy.world 43 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Your mum's so slow, it took her 9 months to make a joke.

Wow, that's brutal!

I had a flatmate at one time who walked past my room, sick his head in the doorway

and said"Your mother just rang, she said she wishes she aborted you in the 2nd trimester"

[–] NichEherVielleicht@feddit.org 16 points 1 week ago

That's s good one

[–] DmMacniel@feddit.org 29 points 1 week ago (1 children)

What I came to ask. He should be here.

[–] bjoern_tantau@swg-empire.de 22 points 1 week ago

YO MOMMA is so fat, we're seriously concerned for her health.

[–] MacaqueAndCheese@lemmy.ca 15 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Your mommy is so big that the big store called and said "no that's too big".

[–] baguettefish@discuss.tchncs.de 4 points 1 week ago (2 children)

trump called her very bigly tremendous

[–] MacaqueAndCheese@lemmy.ca 4 points 1 week ago

I've never heard of this trump fellow

[–] Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca 2 points 1 week ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

Trump wasn't interested in her. Too old

[–] DarkFuture@lemmy.world 13 points 1 week ago (3 children)

One of the greatest tragedies of life is getting to an age where you have to stop the mom jokes IRL because people's moms start IRL dying.

[–] Etterra@discuss.online 4 points 1 week ago

My mom was an abusive piece of shit who I haven't seen or talked to since I was 18. I'm now 47, and I have no problem with people making fun of her. Thanks to therapy I don't hate her anymore, but that does not mean that I love her.

[–] NichEherVielleicht@feddit.org 10 points 1 week ago (1 children)

The mom jokes have nothing to do with the irl mums. My mum died 20 years ago, a good mum joke doesn't.

[–] Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca 9 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

My favourite dead mamma joke was when a friend said "I fucked your mom last night." I replied "How? Phone sex through a Ouija board?" Then making the hand gesture pointing to the letter "O" over and over again.

[–] knobbysideup@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 week ago

Mom died 2 years ago. Still get these at work. I take no offense.

[–] Zagam@piefed.social 13 points 1 week ago

Yo momma so old her social security number is 1.

[–] eestileib@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 1 week ago (2 children)

That is an unbelievably sexy woman in the pic, damn.

[–] potatoboy@lemmy.world 2 points 6 days ago (1 children)
[–] eestileib@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 6 days ago

Sexy and fat

It's not healthy but it looks good

[–] Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] eestileib@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 6 days ago

Gimme a bellybutton I can build a shed in

"You like thicc girls?"

"Yes"

"How thicc?"

" "

[–] bjoern_tantau@swg-empire.de 5 points 1 week ago

YO MOMMA is so stupid she sits at ALDI's under the counter and goes beep.

[–] Zagam@piefed.social 5 points 1 week ago

Yo momma so mean it take a train and 2 busse to get on her good side.

[–] Jax@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Whoever created this image should be slapped

[–] NichEherVielleicht@feddit.org 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca 3 points 1 week ago

By Jax's mum. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

[–] mech@feddit.org 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Yo mamma so big, when she sits around the house, she sits around the house.

[–] Etterra@discuss.online 3 points 1 week ago

That's like the first one you learn when you're in grade school. It's right up there with "yo momma so fat she got her own ZIP code."

[–] lasta@piefed.world 3 points 1 week ago

Yo mama so hairy they filmed Gorillas in the Mist in her shower.

[–] ZkhqrD5o@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

"Richard Matthew Stallman, Titanic"

[–] purplerabbit@piefed.blahaj.zone -5 points 1 week ago

Meh, can't say I'm really nostalgic for fatphobic jokes.