My uncle usually cooks at our family thanksgiving, and it's always really goddamn good
this post was submitted on 25 Nov 2025
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Thanksgiving is for the kids to stay out of the kitchen. I teach cooking on other day. Cleanup is a different story. If you got hand you clean or youll catch hands.
We have division of labor, particularly for big parties like Thanksgiving. I don't want help with cooking but don't want to have to clean up. That's our general division of labor because I legitimately enjoy cooking, and people legitimately love eating what I cook; and husband says he would much rather clean up. His dad is a better cook than his mom, I don't think it's a sexist thing. So sure I have to do more cooking (started yesterday) but he does more too. The kids just do overflow mostly and while all of them are competent in some way in a kitchen, the distribution of good cooks is not a gender split among them.
The technology split is more gendered, all of the boys (including the one who started out a girl) are gamers and can build a computer, 3/4 of the girls are gamers and technically competent but only one is willing to fuck around with the hardware. One, my oldest, is not at all comfortable with technology, does not want to know how anything works. But she worked construction/home renovation and is good with saw and drill.
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Maybe I didn't help cook as much but was my job to clean after pretty much every dinner. Always thanked my Mum for the dinner nightly (regardless of my taste preferences). Pretty much set the table for dinners all regular night and cleaned up.
Larger dinners with company she let me stop cleaning after awhile but these days I'd gladly clean till the end, she made the best dinners.
Specially young boys if you involve them they will be invested in the entire process! This is great advise!
Who doesn't do that? What a weird assumption.
My dad never learned to cook, clean, or take care of his own hair/clothes. He had 7 sisters who were all taught that taking care of the boys and the house was their main duty in life. None of those sisters ever touched a hammer or a wrench.
His dad never learned to cook, clean, or take care of himself in any way. He had 4 sisters who were all taught that taking care of the boys and the house was their main duty in life. None of those sisters ever touched a hammer or a wrench.
I have two boys - they were taught to cook and clean and take care of themselves. And once they had that basic stuff down they were taught the hammer and wrench.
My grandpa and my father in law were never taught how to cook.
My grandpa could make porridge and sandwiches. My father in law can grill, but that’s it. My dad doesn’t even grill.
There are definitely households where cooking is seen as feminine and boys aren’t encouraged.
Thankfully my family is full of excellent cooks and all of my brothers and I love to cook. Some of my favourite memories of holidays were cooking with my mom before Christmas Eve so we didn’t have to cook until Boxing Day. I think the cooking part was better than the eating part, we had a full on hors d’oeuvre assembly line.
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If you cook, you don't clean. If you clean, you don't cook. Tell them to take their pick.
Living alone, I find this to be a fast way to a messy sink.
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