Spiderbro
Have a cute girl over for dinner one night. See a cockroach in the kitchen. Oh god the girl I brought home is going to think I'm disgusting. Spiderbro darts out from under the cabinets and grabs it. I freak out and go to stomp on him. He looks up at me. I hesitate. He pulls the roach under the counter and kills it for me. Alright, fine, he can stay. He killed bugs for me all year. Hell, he killed other spiders for me, too. I would drop bits of meat on the floor for him to eat. We become fast friends. Dark and stormy night. Burglars break in to rape my girlfriend and kill me. Tackle the first one, but the second one pulls a gun and points it at my face. Prepared to die. Look up. Spiderbro is on the ceiling. Drops onto burglar's face, bites his eye. Burglar freaks out and starts flailing around. I grab the gun. Girlfriend calls the cops. Police come, arrest burglars. I spend the next day looking for spiderbro. No sign of him. Check his home, see a pile of roaches he killed and wrapped up, never ate them just killed them for me. Spiderbro gave his life for me. Never forget Spiderbro.



