this post was submitted on 04 Jul 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] QueenHawlSera@sh.itjust.works 2 points 3 hours ago* (last edited 3 hours ago)

Frenchy McPistols

Cause I'm American but my ancestors are from France

But I'm trans so I'm sure there would be a dickchick or she could be slightly tasteful and give me the middle name Elagabalus

[–] Meron35@lemmy.world 1 points 2 hours ago
[–] fittedsyllabi@lemmy.world 3 points 4 hours ago

Asian Invasion.

[–] RickyRigatoni@retrolemmy.com 3 points 4 hours ago

I'm your average white american so Teddy Gunsight

[–] swagmoney@lemmy.ca 6 points 6 hours ago

cracker bongcloud

[–] Fedegenerate@lemmynsfw.com 2 points 6 hours ago

I'm a little embarrassed about how many of these, if not for the thread, sound like believable names to me. Mayhaps I'm not as cultured as I would like to think.

I'm white northern European ancestry and born in the States but based on my orientation it would probably be Freddy McCocksucker or something.

[–] SuluBeddu@feddit.it 16 points 16 hours ago (1 children)
[–] But_my_mom_says_im_cool@lemmy.world 6 points 15 hours ago* (last edited 15 hours ago)

Jose Frijoles Sanchez

[–] zloubida@sh.itjust.works 6 points 16 hours ago

François LaGrenouille

Whitey McCracker

[–] napkin2020@sh.itjust.works 23 points 1 day ago

Kimchi Chong

[–] explodicle@sh.itjust.works 12 points 1 day ago

Wyatt Yankstrash

[–] finitebanjo@lemmy.world 9 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

Midley Plainwest - "Slytherin" the sorting hat said with a drawl.

EDIT: "Ah dangit theres a snake on my robe!"

[–] SassyRamen@lemmy.world 2 points 20 hours ago

Write that down! Write that down!!

[–] AlexLost@lemmy.world 12 points 1 day ago (2 children)
[–] pyre@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago

nah first name would probably be Sori

[–] Droggelbecher@lemmy.world 72 points 1 day ago (5 children)

I'm white so she wouldn't base my name on ethnicity, she'd probably go with Tr*nny Girlman

[–] criss_cross@lemmy.world 19 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Her trans character in Hogwarts Legacy was Sirona Ryan so you’re not that far off.

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[–] Xtallll@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 1 day ago

Or Amanda Richardson

[–] SassyRamen@lemmy.world 9 points 1 day ago

Tranny Girlman the abused and hated house elf, that everyone thinks is weird and creepy because (and this is always mentioned when Rolling writes about T.G.) HE wears a dress and makes everyone uncomfortable.

A little on the nose like Ron Weasly's dirt.

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[–] BeNotAfraid@lemmy.world 15 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Wow, what a fun way to give a data point about yourself to attach to a public profile already connected to your IP address and potentially your email as well. Cool!

[–] StupidBrotherInLaw@lemmy.world 17 points 1 day ago (3 children)

User name does not check out.

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[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 23 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Klaus Schnitzel

Though later someone will mention he changed his name from Hitler

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[–] agent_nycto@lemmy.world 10 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Cornshucker MacWoodshoe

Wait she's British so it would probably be Corningfrumple MacWallibootenshiretonwotsalldisden

[–] cosmictrickster@lemmy.world 6 points 21 hours ago

Pronounced as “John Smith”.

[–] Tar_alcaran@sh.itjust.works 13 points 1 day ago

Stroopwaffel van Klompmill.

[–] konalt@lemmy.world 58 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] SassyRamen@lemmy.world 29 points 1 day ago

From the POOREST family in the entire land and always dirty

[–] lobut@lemmy.ca 39 points 1 day ago (2 children)
[–] pyre@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago (1 children)

i mean she wasn't far off when she named the Asian character. Cho Chang if you didn't know (yeah it doesn't even make sense). clearly named so only because she knew they would never publish that name.

[–] Gladaed@feddit.org 2 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

I never associated Cho with a ching Chong China man.

[–] pyre@lemmy.world 4 points 21 hours ago

it's barely a variation on it, and also doesn't make sense as a name because it consists of two common family names from two different Asian countries, Korea and China. if you'd like to reach, you might argue that both names come from either China or Korea with less common romanization of one of the names but it's still two family names.

but we already know through several examples that she doesn't give a fuck when it comes to other cultures so it's most likely that she thought of the phrase above and changed it a little so the editors wouldn't have to tell her.

it's the same reason she didn't use the name Tyrone Escapedslave for the black guy and settled for Kingsley fucking Shacklebolt.

[–] VitoRobles@lemmy.today 7 points 1 day ago

Pretty sure that is already a Harry Potter character.

[–] KingGimpicus@sh.itjust.works 20 points 1 day ago (1 children)
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[–] gedaliyah@lemmy.world 28 points 1 day ago (4 children)

Crooknose Goldhorde the goblin

[–] pyre@lemmy.world 2 points 13 hours ago

i almost choked on my food reading this

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[–] AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world 9 points 1 day ago (1 children)
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[–] EchoSnail@lemmy.zip 26 points 1 day ago (4 children)

Y'all out here propagating some covert data mining

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[–] KazuchijouNo@lemy.lol 40 points 1 day ago

Tequitaco Sanchez

[–] Naich@lemmings.world 40 points 1 day ago (1 children)
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