this post was submitted on 17 Apr 2025
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Today I Learned (TIL)

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[–] [email protected] 28 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

In a way, it worked; I never fucked a graham cracker.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

So, you’re saying you want to fuck graham crackers but the desire was curbed?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

If you haven't fucked a graham cracker, are you even living?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I've never fucked a graham cracker.

I am also dead inside.

...guess I'm putting graham crackers on the shopping list.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

That's the spirit!

Maybe make some smores if you know what I mean (full disclosure: I don't know what I mean).

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

adds lotrimin to the shopping list

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago

You haven't fucked a graham-cracker... yet!

[–] [email protected] 21 points 2 weeks ago

brb, gonna go eat some graham crackers off my wife just to mock this guy

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 weeks ago

This guy's whole life sounds like one long projection about the time he assaulted a girl in college

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 weeks ago

"[His doctor] gave Graham opium enemas, which may have actually contributed to the decline of Graham’s health."

Didn't help but what a way to die.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

So, honey grahams cereal is basically graham crackers as a cereal, and cereal was also invented to repress sexual desire (specifically masturbation iirc), so is honey grahams twice as effective or is it a double negative situation and they cancel out? Asking for "science".

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

I just did a study with a sample size of 1 and the results are in: doesn't work

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

Yeah, well two days ago I made little ramekin sized cheesecakes with no bake cheesecake, chocolate mousse, and a graham cracker crust as a nice gesture and it had the opposite effect.
So, suck it, you cracker-lovin’ kill-joys!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago

It sounds absolutely delicious!!

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 weeks ago

If you're looking for a 12 hour deep rabbit hole, go watch the knowing better episodes on this topic on YouTube

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

So graham crackers are to curb sexual desires. So too are corn flakes.

Why won’t my carbs let me touch my penis????

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago

Carbs don't care. Wierd non doctors care.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago

"The road to wellsville" is hilarious, and over the top, but the parts you think are artistic license probably aren't.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago

Well Sylvester wouldn't like to know that graham crackers make me all horny then would he? Quick, someone dig him up and tell him.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

We changed the recipe since then, adding sugar and spices to make them actually taste good, so we can't expect it to still work. Not that it ever worked in the first place.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago

Knowing Better has done a bunch of videos relating to Sylvester Graham, in particular the one on early vegetarianism. Highly recommend if you like long-form videos.