this post was submitted on 19 Oct 2025
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Microblog Memes

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"Ah yes, let's fucking ROB a KITCHEN with a POCKET KNIFE, when my would-be victims are surrounded by knives of all shapes and sizes, pans heavy enough to crack someone's skull, cleavers that could take my limbs off in one swing, literal BOILING LIQUIDS in HUGE pots, and they're also SERVICE WORKERS who are probably homicidal from the bullshit customers pull in a regular day's work and are just looking for an excuse to kill someone legally. Surely I won't get done like Julius Caesar."

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[โ€“] Triumph@fedia.io 57 points 1 month ago (1 children)

The meat slicer says "We're gonna take our time."

[โ€“] SalamenceFury@lemmy.world 15 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I think if it was one of those commercial meat bone saw machines the would-be assailant would probably need a new pair of pants. Even moreso with a death stare accompanying it that says "You do not wanna know what I am going to do with this if you don't get the fuck out right now."