this post was submitted on 22 Aug 2025
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Wtf does « gave my life to Christ » means in that situation? Did mf get baptized in the parking lot??
i think he gave a life altering blowjob in that parking lot
To Jesus?
i don't expect cracker barrel parking lot sex partners to give real names
Dedicated it to Jesus
Bro put it ong fr fr no cap
yes, he noticed that he was a really hard worker when he was hanging out in the Home Depot parking lot across the street, and he thought that he deserved something nice
Swallowed for the lord.
Got engaged to a guy in the parking lot. That's my made up story and I'm sticking to it.
Got shot by someone named Josh
He fucked the dishwasher behind the dumpster
Maybe it rained a lot and dumpsters were water tight back in his day.
~~Only Baptists baptize~~, and it's literally dunking your whole body into water. We had a huge tub behind the pulpit, it was about three feet deep and 12'x8'. I can't imagine that happening in a Cracker Barrel parking lot, unless it's one of those pool-in-a-pickup-truck-bed situations.
"Giving your life to Christ" is basically what it sounds like. An often emotional moment in which you make a personal commitment to the Biblical idea of Christ and his teachings. Think of it like an epiphany.
Edit: my bad guys, I got the terminology wrong about which sect of bigots have wet tshirt contests.
No, absolutely not. Baptism is arguably the most important sacrament for all christian churches! Where I'm from, the catholique baptism is typically done for babies by gently pouring water on their forehead. Ofc it's less spectacular than the "full immersion" baptism by the Baptists (also used by the pentcotalists as well btw).
But anyway, none of that make sense to be done in a parking lot. Reading the other comments, I like the idea that the dude got suddenly touched by grace after eating a gross fish meal at Cracker Barrel!
Mormons do the full dunk, too. Just sayin.
Baptisms aren't just a Baptist thing, though they generally put more weight behind it than most other denominations that do it. At least from what I've seen.
I was Pentecostal growing up, and a few times a year- generally around Christmas and Easter- they'd do an open baptism and anyone who wanted could get dunked. I went to one church without that big tub behind the pulpit you're talking about- they'd do it in the river nearby. Cold as hell in the winter.
Basically every brand of Christianity that I'm aware of has some form of baptism, though the exact way it's done varies a lot.
Matthew 28:19 is, "Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit"
I was baptised in the Church of England.