memes

You know, I posted that comment sort of unthinkingly, but you are right.

There’s a book called “Why does he do that? Inside the minds of angry and controlling men” that’s on my reading list. (A good summary of the book is available here)
The author repeatedly highlights exactly the point you brought up - that abusers will wield therapy language to perpetuate their abuse. He instead suggests the only real way to change abusers (who are not necessarily the same as sociopaths, mind you) is to put them in programs tailored to abusers to more or less make them realize how much they need to learn empathy, and equip them with the ability to use that empathy.