this post was submitted on 23 Apr 2025
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The original Bri Larson tweet makes me think of a recent post on lemmy that showed younger men are less and less likely to ask women out in person. Some people in the comments said "hey it's ok to approach women in public just be ok with them saying no" but when I read what women say about being approached in public (like bri larsons tweet here) I get the feeling that I should never approach women in public because I'll make them feel scared.
I'm not talking about the top tweet where a guy is memorizing your address, that is creepy, I understand that, but the guy in the bri Larson tweet wasn't being creepy, just shooting his shot right? Or am I way off here?
"Cold-calling" women for dates in public is kinda sketchy in general.
Put the effort in to getting to know them first. If you are at a point in your life where asking random strangers for a date is your best game, you need to work on yourself.
This isn't bashing you for not being handsome/pretty, or fit, or rich. You need to go out and do things that you enjoy, try new things, and find partners who enjoy the same things, then see if they are open to dating.
Also, mutual friends are the best for getting you a date with someone. It worked for me, and it can work for you!
I mean, a date can be a pretty safe and tame event. It's how you might get to know someone.
You shouldn't expect anything romantic out of such a date, and certainly makes sense to meet at the venue and the venue be very open and visible. But to say you can't even offer a chance to get to know each other without getting to know each other is a bit over the top.
Better chances in interest themed events and activities to have a promising match of course, but there has to be some opportunity to get acquainted.
There is a huge difference between "you're pretty and that's the only thing I know about you, want to go on a date?" And "Hey, we share a few similar interests and you are pleasant to talk to, and attractive, would you like to go on a date?"
You should have a baseline beyond simply looking at them. A date is where you get to know them beyond that baseline. If it's a stranger, it isn't unreasonable to say you should have at least a few minutes of conversation before asking them out.