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Part of talking about these issues, talking about rape and how we treat rape victims, is about pushing away the embarrassment and shame that comes with being victimized in this way.
We all play a part as to why she felt uncomfortable coming forward with this info right away.
It’s not her fault that she responded the way she did. It was a trauma response.
It's also important to understand that the unfortunate reality is that even if we get there some people will immediately move towards trying to be ok rather than prioritizing stuff like calling the cops and gathering evidence. Taking a shower, disassociating, and trying to keep moving forward without acknowledging what happened are all behaviors we need to be understanding and sympathetic towards even if we as fellow citizens and justice oriented people do wish that more evidence had been collected.
And that's all ignoring the fact that rape kits are rarely even tested. It's still worth getting one done if you're a victim. But victims and non victims alike should be demanding better on this front.
Very good points, thank you!