this post was submitted on 17 Sep 2026
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[–] susieq0044@sh.itjust.works 14 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (2 children)

Seems to be a very US American problem, in most other parts of the world everybody involved would try to deescalate - from politicians who decide on the gun laws, down to the criminals and the victims and their families.

[–] Feathercrown@lemmy.world 12 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Are we just picking metrics at random that non-US people are supposedly better at now or what

[–] deft@lemmy.wtf 4 points 5 days ago (5 children)

So if someone breaks into your home, you're gonna have a chat? Like I don't understand.

They defended their home. Whether with a sword, a gun, a toxic weapon, superpowers, a dog, whatever. Makes what you're saying seem quite outlandish.

[–] Mpatch@lemmy.world 8 points 4 days ago

Hahaha. A CHAT? like 90% of people on lemmy are to scared to even say hello to their own reflection, never mind a telling a stranger to stop something.

[–] Balinares@pawb.social 6 points 4 days ago (2 children)

So if someone breaks into your home, you're gonna have a chat?

Yes, absofuckinglutely, how is that even in question.

Look. People don't just randomly walk into a someone else's home. There are not so many reasons why they might, and most of them don't in fact put you in more danger than you are bringing to the situation yourself.

Most of the time it's going to be someone who's confused or addled for some reason or other -- dementia, other mental impairment, poor reaction to intoxication, etc. So, someone in some degree of distress, and I sure as fuck hope that your default reaction to someone in distress isn't to just shoot to kill. You would not believe how effective it can be to just ask someone something like "are you okay mate?". I swear to God, if you find it in yourself, sit them down for tea. Yes, that takes human qualities that are not remotely a given. Still worth it if you can manage it.

Sometimes it's just plain opportunistic burglary. Research shows that burglars go into a state of focus not unlike artists as they try to maximize the value of what they can take while minimizing the time spent on the premises. (So, wallets and credit cards. No, not your TV.) Disrupting that focus generally suffices to interrupt the burglary. So, "wrong house, mate", or whatever choice of non-escalating words you prefer to signal that the gig's up. They'll be out so fast that sitting them down for tea won't even be an option.

And even if all else fails and you're determined to escalate, you could still fire warning shots. This is not God damn video game enemy. It's a person. Whatever reason brought that person into your home is never ever gonna be something they're happy about; you can see that, right?

Understand: having a fearful reaction is normal. But succumbing to that fear to the point you'd rather preemptively kill a human being is not. It's the negation of everything civilization is constructed on.

[–] saimen@feddit.org 4 points 4 days ago

I think this perfectly illustrates the problem with the gun laws in the US. In every other country, something like you described would be the norm. The problem in the US is that each side has to think of the possibility the other one has a gun which by itself already escalates these situations tremendously.

[–] WoodScientist@lemmy.world 2 points 4 days ago

You are ignorant of how the law works. The law doesn't condone firing warning shots, brandishing a gun as a warning, or trying to shoot someone nonlethally. It only condones exercising complete and total self defense.

[–] ximtor@lemmy.zip 9 points 4 days ago (2 children)

It sounds absolutely fucking insane to me to shoot someone 4-5 times, even if they break into your home. But i guess it's a cultural difference lol.

[–] deft@lemmy.wtf 4 points 4 days ago (3 children)

So again are you gonna like have a conversation with them? I don't understand.

How many times do you strike someone breaking into your home or do you wait to see what their intent is?

These things happen fast, many people have a weapon ready for home defense especially if you live in unsafe areas and once that switch is hit to act most people go the whole way. Guns don't work like they do in a movie you don't shoot someone and they fly back or dramatically are defeated. People can often take several rounds before that's that.

And the age old saying goes, if you intend to pull a gun use it.

[–] RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world 9 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (1 children)

Nobodys having conversations. I don’t know why you seem to be implying a binary choice of gun vs conversation.

You can defend yourself in European countries, but the thing is that the defense must be proportional. You cannot kill someone for stealing a TV or your wallet and not physically threatening you with lethal force.

[–] deft@lemmy.wtf -4 points 4 days ago

https://nypost.com/2003/10/31/golden-girls-defeat-thug-with-kindness/

https://www.kgns.tv/2023/08/03/an-87-year-old-woman-fought-off-an-intruder-then-fed-him-after-he-told-her-he-was-awfully-hungry/?outputType=amp

https://www.nbcnewyork.com/news/local/thug-thanks-would-be-victim-for-saving-his-life/2117587/?amp=1

My brain is rotted? Maybe you should reconsider your perception of America.

Meanwhile France, Austria and Finland and experience way more break ins than the US and on a city to city basis places like London and Paris have way more robberies than in the US.

Didn't Sweden have a sweep of gangs using explosives and grenades a few years ago?

You're kind of being delusional yourself. We can argue all day about gun violence but acting like the US just shoots people is genuinely ignorant as hell. Whether guns should or should not be owned for self defense isn't as simple to argue. I personally would prefer owning a gun for home defense than not because there are some crazy and violent folk out there.

[–] Lemminary@lemmy.world 3 points 4 days ago (1 children)

A conversation? Huh?? Where'd that come from?

Also, people have had conversations with intruders without shooting them dead. https://youtu.be/3P6GvOJK08s

American gun culture is rotting your brain, just so you know. Live abroad for once. See what the rest of the world sees.

[–] deft@lemmy.wtf 0 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Because he talked about de-escalation with an intruder. What other forms of deescalating is there than talking? He's literally suggesting to have a conversation with your intruder.

[–] Lemminary@lemmy.world 4 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

You can attempt to flee. And if you can't leave, you can also acknowledge them and not make sudden movements, ask what they want to get them out asap, and if they seem out of their senses, you can ask what's up. All without holding a conversation.

You can try to handle the situation without a gun and immediately shooting them in the head. No need to be a gun nut all the time.

[–] deft@lemmy.wtf -2 points 3 days ago (1 children)

It's very silly your perspective on how this shit plays out. You're like "well did you tell the bully he hurt your feelings? Maybe he'd stop if you shared how you feel."

Absolutely goofy.

[–] Lemminary@lemmy.world 3 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

This is the second time you've resorted to ridicule and strawmanning rather than refuting the point. Talk about "goofy" some more.

[–] ximtor@lemmy.zip -4 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (1 children)

So again are you gonna like have a conversation with them? I don't understand.

Call the police? Hide? Hit them with a chair? Idk, there would probably be quite a few things I would come up with, even in a panic, than fucking shoot someome. Not to mention the obvious lack of guns anywhere nearby. Might be weird to you, but as i said cultural difference or something.

How many times do you strike someone breaking into your home or do you wait to see what their intent is?

Not sure what you mean, but obviously I would intend to restrain them or knock them out or whatever, while not using any kind of intentional lethal force. Thats my whole point. Luckily never had to think about it, kinda my poiny of the initial comment.

These things happen fast, many people have a weapon ready for home defense especially if you live in unsafe areas and once that switch is hit to act most people go the whole way. Guns don't work like they do in a movie you don't shoot someone and they fly back or dramatically are defeated. People can often take several rounds before that's that.

Happy I am not anywhere near a place where this is considered normal and not intending to go there. But most gun owners are aware that one can be killed by guns right? Even if they don't fly away like in the movies? Weird concept to me to need 4-5 shots, but i guess i get the panic reaction if one thinks guns are normal.

And the age old saying goes, if you intend to pull a gun use it.

Luckily, I don't intend that.

I didn't mean to come up as offensive to you or something, but it is icredible to me how shooting and killing someone is viewed as perfectly acceptable. That was my main point

Edit: on a second thought maybe i would indeed try some form of communication first? Like at least shout for them to freeze or whatever? Obviously i have no idea about the exact circumstances, but i guess its a form of "having a conversation" before shooting

[–] WoodScientist@lemmy.world 3 points 4 days ago (2 children)

Call the police when the rapist is already in your bedroom? You're smoking crack.

As far as it being incredible that shooting someone is viewed as acceptable? I'm sorry, but I have no problem with people using lethal violence to protect themselves from being killed or raped. And honestly, the world's better off without murderers and rapists walking around in it.

[–] susieq0044@sh.itjust.works 2 points 3 days ago

Where did you get the information that the intruder mentioned above intended to rape the guy that shot him?

[–] ximtor@lemmy.zip 2 points 3 days ago

Insane that we live on the same planet but in different worlds. Sorry you have to live like this.

And honestly, the world's better off without murderers and rapists walking around in it.

I completely agree, but thats not your call to make imo, less so in a panic situation. Call me crackhead, but i'm glad i am apparently in a fairytale world.

[–] starman2112@sh.itjust.works 1 points 4 days ago (1 children)

You'd be surprised how many shots a person can take before they actually stop. As long as the heart and spine are intact, a guy with a knife can survive a bullet wound long enough to finish the fight

[–] LaLuzDelSol@lemmy.world 3 points 4 days ago

My ex girlfriend was on a murder trial. The perpetrator (who was convicted) shot the victim in an altercation. However, after being shot but before dying, the victim rushed the perpetrator and beat the shit out of him with his bare hands. So yeah, obviously not a justified shooting in this case but it does show how shooting once is often not enough to stop an attacker.

[–] Doomsider@lemmy.world 2 points 4 days ago

Straight to death fantasy.

[–] susieq0044@sh.itjust.works -1 points 4 days ago (1 children)

In general, police forces across the world “advise you to stay calm, avoid any confrontation, and leave the house immediately if it is safe to do so. You should then call the police from a safe location. The police strongly recommend against confronting the intruder, as this could escalate the situation and put you at risk.”

[–] WoodScientist@lemmy.world 0 points 4 days ago

Put you at risk? You're already at fucking risk with a potential rapist in your house.