Selfhosted
A place to share alternatives to popular online services that can be self-hosted without giving up privacy or locking you into a service you don't control.
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XMPP is nice but even with all of the quality of life extensions it definitely feels clunky. I tried switching to it recently from matrix and while matrix leaves a lot to be desired I found it was more useful in its current form than XMPP.
I use a jmp.chat # w Snikket server on Cheogram. Calls handling through native dialer. Works pretty well minus kicking off group chats with mixed users.