this post was submitted on 21 Jun 2026
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Lava is a rare counterexample. It's way more dangerous than we thought as kids.
Kid, excitedly jumping around the room: "The floor is lava!"
Parent: "You know, Billy, if the floor were really made of lava, jumping from furniture to furniture wouldn't really help you. The volcanic gases alone would be enough to suffocate you. The heat would be no picnic either. You'd be suffering in agony until your final, searing breath."
Kid stops jumping and stares emptily off into the distance: "I ... I think I'm gonna go play alone in my room now."
[door shuts]
Continues: "Heh, imagine that, Billy. Just, bursting into flames because the stuff got within mere feet of you. Wow. What a way to go..."