this post was submitted on 28 May 2026
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Not The Onion

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[–] MyBrainHurts@piefed.ca 43 points 6 days ago (6 children)

That was an option the whole time?!?

[–] icanbrewmushrooms@lemmy.world 28 points 6 days ago (1 children)

It was an option, but the fact there's an article about it suggests he got caught, and I imagine the consequences will be worse than having to attend a work party.

Other options (with consequences of varying severities) include: jumping out of a window; never quiting the job until you die so they can't throw you any parties; not showing up for the last day of work; telling your colleagues you don't want a leaving party.

[–] Korhaka@sopuli.xyz 11 points 6 days ago (3 children)

Calling in a bomb threat sounds preferable tbh. Just make sure you use a burner phone.

[–] evidences@lemmy.world 9 points 6 days ago

Do you think cops ever get mad if someone literally calls in a bomb threat, like "Jesus Christ this could have been an email."

[–] rockerface@lemmy.cafe 3 points 5 days ago

But you still have to talk to people on the phone. I'll take the window, thanks.

And use text to speech so they can't recognize your voice.

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