I tried talking about this with my girlfriend and she kind of didn't give me any input except "I understand why that makes you upset"
Long story short someone I used to be friends with started saying things like they hate me, don't want to see me if I'm around, would actively avoid me.
I initially thought it was a meme or a joke as usually people say stuff like that "I haaate this dude maaan" but jokingly, but then I found out it was real.
I first got mad at my friends for not saying anything, people don't want to take sides so they didn't want to "pick" me or them and say "this person is wrong here". I wasn't okay with someone saying that, and in addition to that I wasn't okay with people saying nothing about this situation. So I stopped talking to everyone altogether, some people DM me here and there, one person has said "other person was in the wrong"
I felt as though someone intentionally was trying to push me out of my own friend group and no one cared, therefore in my eyes it felt like people were okay for me to be pushed out.
Anyways recently people have been trying to get me to hang out again and they just say "just pretend that person isn't there"
I don't know how to cope with this situation, I had lots of fun with those people but because of my BPD I feel like they can never be my friends again. It's a feeling hard to explain but I've had it explained to me as "people with bpd struggle to see gray situations and tend to see everything in black/white". So in my mind that entire friend group is deep black.
I don't really know where this is going, is it possible to even recover this situation? btw I'm not going to bend over or make ultimatums.
I just wish that other person never existed and everything would be okay, or maybe I wish I never interacted with that person ever and this would have never happened.
I don't have the social skillset to decode this situation and my BPD is making it near impossible to not feel empty about it
I think in a normal relationship you'd seek to mends things but I have 0 interest in trying to work anything out with this person.
I'd rather find an entirely new friend group than bend over for someone who's trying to push me out.
In addition to that they're someone's friend and not really mine. I have no connection with them, I don't want or care for any apologies in either direction by me or from them.
Someone tried to set something up and the response on their side was "I don't care" which is impossible to work with and pissed me off even further.
Your framing this as "push me out" why do you think the other person is thinking this way?
Them personally wanting to avoid you doesn't mean that they are attempting to sway or manipulate your friends. Atleast from what I know from what you've said so far
Was there any drama between you to before this happened? Anything besides this incident? Or something between you and your friends who is friends with this individual?
It's essentially an ultimatum from their end "if this person's here I won't be" so, yeah I very much see that as pushing me out.
No drama, if anything I was very polite and cordial, I think I mentioned elsewhere before over what I said that made them upset. I realized also I don't want to feel like I'm walking on eggshells talking to them either, so in other words I'm not looking to mend things as I imagine in the future if I say something again that they have issues with this will prop up again anyways.