this post was submitted on 16 May 2026
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This only works on like mid movies, maybe. You can't do it with a film like Plan 9 from Outer Space or The Room because the jank is part of the appeal. But maybe an actually good version of Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow? Sucker Punch, but with a better director?
Mid movies with an interesting premise. That's the point of OP's post.
Scarface, Omega Man, The Bird Cage, Thomas Crown Affair, Ocean's 11, Fist Full of Dollars, Vanilla Sky, Wizard of Oz, The Bourne Identity: all remakes. Arguably, the new Dune movies might be considered remakes of a relatively mid original movie, though the new ones are far more tied to the book.
So taking the 1993 mid kids' movie Rookie of the Year and adapting it to a modem take where the lead is 19 and plays soccer for Arsenal or whatever, would be what OP means. Or redo the 1993 racist POS movie Falling Down. Or Dave, JFC.
Wow I learned some things here.
Question though - I haven't seen Falling Down in over 20 years. What makes it a racist POS movie? Was I so blind back then?
It's been a while for me as well, but IIRC it was a lot of POCs playing the microagression villains.
There is no saving Sucker Punch. The fundamental premise of the movie is each rape is a fight scene showing a literal interpretation of a metaphorical struggle. It's not recoverable.
how about we gut the premise but keep the badass ninja schoolgirls and campy explosion-filled fight scenes and charmingly dated CGI, and let Angela Robinson direct it
Why? Why is something so easily explained impossible?
Can it be done? Maybe. But the problem with making a metaphorical struggle a physical fight is that the audience for both is drastically different. Many people affected by rape hold a feeling of helplessness about the event. A Zach Snyder 300 style fight scene is literally about exerting control and overcoming. For a person to make such a drastic emotional pivot begs the question were they were ever feeling at all?
Uh, they remade The Room starring Bob Odenkirk.
somebody PLEASE remake
American Mary
Daybreakers
cool ass premises but flawed executions
They remade Dune, and somehow managed to make it worse.