this post was submitted on 02 Apr 2026
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Experimenting as an adult (piefed.social)
submitted 3 months ago by MaitreMortem681@piefed.social to c/lgbt@lemmy.world
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I never experimented with my sexuality as a teenager - dysphoria, depression, autism, etc. You get the gist. Good news: I'm finally starting to get my ducks in a row at the decrepit old age of 23 /j. Bad news: Oh god now I have to address this shit.

Gonna be honest, I have no ideas where to start. So... how did y'all figure out if you liked men/women/both/neither/whatever? Was it an instinctual thing that you just Noticed one day? Did you have to go on dates and try things out?

I'm a little nervous about coming across as an asshole if I hook up with someone and then realize "Oh! I hate this!" halfway through, y'know?

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[–] heliotrope@retrofed.com 2 points 3 months ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

20NB here. Possibly in a similar boat to you at my age. I consider myself abrosexual, but I have not been able to experiment as of yet.

~~As for how I figured things out, it's quite simple. I am panromantic and demiromantic, and I have only loved three people in my life. All three are fellow enbies, but between them they cover the three main areas of the gender spectrum.~~

I also see a fair amount of (generally non-spicy) fanart on Tumblr and Pinterest, which has strengthened my convictions.

Because of my ~~demiromanticism~~ aromanticisn, as well as depression (self-Dx; 99.999% certainty) and autism (awaiting formal Dx; the NHS is shit), I have not started dating ~~yet~~ and I have not been in any relationships; so this is entirely instinctual and has not been tested.

EDIT: I was wrong. Those crushes were platonic, and I am aromantic.