this post was submitted on 20 Mar 2026
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do i pass? (quokk.au)
submitted 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) by erin@quokk.au to c/mtf@lemmy.blahaj.zone
 

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sometimes dysphoric about face idk but sometimes not
8 days and im roungly a year on HRT

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[–] dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (10 children)

In general yes, though most of your photos are from the same angle which makes it hard to actually tell.

The last photo is clocky imo (probably from the way the shadows lay on your face?) - but still androgynous boy at worst (more ambiguous than obviously male, if that makes sense).

The other photos lean more fem for me - if I try to see a boy I can sorta make my brain do that, but what I see by default is a girl (maybe partially because the t-shirt primes me to see that, but your skin is also soft, there's no beard shadow, etc.).

(Take this all with a grain of salt, not everyone will be able to see you like I can - I also have the brainworms. Just like for you, gender dysphoria warps my perception of myself and others.)

[–] erin@quokk.au 2 points 3 days ago (9 children)

some other, also cool i doesnt have adam apple also as full body - i definitly pass ~162 cm and overall body is ok also i never grew facial hair(even no body hair at all) (how hard it was been to get hrt at 15 and convert transphobic mom to normal)

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[–] dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (6 children)

Thanks for the additional photos - I would say you're solidly androgynous i.e. your sex is ambiguous. The short hair and brown shirt (and the picture where you jut your chin up & out) give cultural cues that you're a boy. How your voice sounds would probably push someone one way or another, and how you dress will change how you are perceived. I can mostly see a girl in your first photos, and mostly a boy in these latter photos.

I would suggest growing out your hair so it looks more feminine, ensuring your voice is feminine, and ensuring you keep testosterone thoroughly suppressed (and at minimum maybe look to eventually get an orchiectomy to guarantee a future free from the threat of testosterone).

You're doing great, and the fact you have avoided facial hair is huge. Protect yourself from male puberty - it is expensive to undo some of the effects, and impossible to undo other effects (like changes to your voice).

[–] erin@quokk.au 3 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

yea my voice is naturally girly
testosterone are near zero stable for 1yr
estradiol - sometimes is waaay too high, ~200pg now, last bloodtest said 469 pg and i lowered back (should be 150+ pg, even 120 pg at lowest give me strong T suppression 0.64 nmol)

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dont ask me why i cut hair but short also okay for now
i want to grow out to chest and colour to idk what color

on reddit ive never got detailed answer imstead i will got depressing "you re valid" "4tranner" (they think are only 4tran dysphoric about every mm l)

[–] dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

those last three photos all I can see is a girl tbh, maybe the first photo has some androgynous qualities, but still totally see a girl (the hair really helps feminize the context)

I definitely think growing the hair out, and taking care of it & styling it in a feminine way will significantly help passing.

and yeah, I don't know why trans communities struggle so much with honest feedback about passing; I'm not going to pretend my feedback or perspective is objective or how everyone will see you - I think we should all acknowledge that different people will see you different ways.

But maybe I'm just a brain-wormed 4tranner 🙃

Also, saying you're valid in response to asking if you pass is so disturbing, like - non-passing people are valid too, it just has nothing to do with the context.

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