What about BBQ tofu (which you can just as easily fry or bake)? You basically just slice up a brick or two of tofu, slather it in BBQ sauce, and cook. You can make big batches and freeze it until you're ready to use it.
Granted, this obviously depends on what you consider highly processed, but I don't think (?) tofu generally has much going on in that department, and you could make your own BBQ sauce if you'd prefer.
You could also do the same thing with seitan or maybe even tempeh.