this post was submitted on 06 May 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] wpb@lemmy.world 7 points 10 hours ago

The number of responses in this thread that sound emotional is making me feel big and strong

[–] FreshLight@sh.itjust.works 17 points 15 hours ago (2 children)

I love how OP restricted themselves to only respond in the mentioned phrases and how some have quite the reaction. Got me rolling.

[–] thethunderwolf@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 14 hours ago

Relax, it's not that deep

[–] BigBananaDealer@lemmy.world 6 points 13 hours ago

uhhh probably football or baseball

thanks

huh

...

okay

thanks

ok pal

yeah

yeah

thanks

yeah

thanks

okay

no

[–] halfeatenpotato@sh.itjust.works 10 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

I'm actually a little surprised at the reactions in this thread. When I read this, I was thinking of my husband and friends I could casually drop these lines on, and it's something we'd all laugh about. I guess I just wasn't thinking of someone using any of these lines sincerely or maliciously, and idk I didnt get the vibe that OP is just a straight cunt that hates men. But I could be totally wrong.

At any rate, somewhere in the thread below, u/wonderingwanderer created an alternate woman ragebait list, and that shit was hilarious as well. My personal favorite was "Act your weight".

I don't know chippy, but I don't get that vibe either. I can tell you that wanderingwonderer is known for throwing a tantrum every time men come up in conversation, so :shrug:

Was act your weight at the bottom of that list? That is fucked up. xD

[–] Wataba@sh.itjust.works 16 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

Ok?

Why though? Isn't there enough misery and shittiness in the world as is? Why stoke the hostility?

For fun?

[–] Return_of_Chippy@lemmy.world 7 points 22 hours ago

You wouldn't get it.

[–] TigerAce@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 15 hours ago* (last edited 15 hours ago) (1 children)

"Wow you got a new truck! I didn't think you had a micropenis that small."

"Wauw you're really overcompensating something huh, I wonder what, that is hahaha."

"Some men have this big dick energy, meaning they act chill because they know they don't have to prove anything so they don't behave like an asshole. It's funny that you have the exact opposite."

"Awww did something hurt your little boy's feelings? In my desk I have for you a tampon and a box of crayons, which one would you prefer?"

"Why are you treating women that way, are you trying to hide your oedipus complex?"

[–] thethunderwolf@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 14 hours ago

Whatever makes you feel big and strong

[–] Danarchy@lemmy.nz 6 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

Some of these are very tallblist

[–] Wakmrow@lemmy.world 14 points 23 hours ago (4 children)

Return_of_chippy in this thread:

[–] Return_of_Chippy@lemmy.world 8 points 23 hours ago (3 children)
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[–] Starduster75@lemmy.world 6 points 21 hours ago (1 children)
  • Shuffleboard probably. Or stamp collecting (on the competitive circuit)
  • That would be ovaltine, but really I am just a sucker for post-WWII Americana
  • hike!
  • I just think of off the wall shit to be said, like "Eat a queer fetus for Jesus" or something
  • Thankfully, because I panic in a wading pool
  • oh, I'm midwestern, pal! Everything really is okay, buddy. Heck, it's fantabulous!
  • As long as it's not always wrong being hard
  • I heard, "Feeling big guys." Screw it, I'm in.
  • Jack Daniels, specifically, and Nyquil (The ol' Bohemian Cocktail, eh)
  • I... never notice, tbh
  • I am. Suffering is real.
  • I should act 6? That's some not-okay RP, buddy.
  • I did, when it existed on my head. Now I do micro-perms.

    Wait. I don't get it.
[–] thethunderwolf@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 14 hours ago

bro is 6 cm tall

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 10 points 1 day ago (1 children)

rEpEaTiNg WhAt ThEy SaY iN a NeRdY vOiCe

[–] drunkpostdisaster@lemmy.world 33 points 1 day ago (2 children)

So be a cunt to someone for no reason pisses them off?

[–] ramenshaman@lemmy.world 8 points 21 hours ago

That's such a short guy thing to say

[–] AnarchistArtificer@slrpnk.net 23 points 1 day ago (3 children)

I mean, that is the definition of ragebaiting

[–] stickly@lemmy.world 16 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I think rage baiting requires some degree of deniability and subterfuge. The "[normal question] if you were athletic?" is a good example. The ones that are just "Shut up short man" are too crass

crass, but also transparently so, which is why they are less effective as ragebait

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[–] SCmSTR@lemmy.blahaj.zone 16 points 1 day ago

"How to have a bad personality and gain toxic friends, a guide for neglected children"

[–] sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com 30 points 1 day ago

'Things you should say if you want everyone to know you're rage-baiting shit disturber'.

[–] Wander@sh.itjust.works 57 points 1 day ago (13 children)

I'm so glad I'm not short. Short guys just get shit on so much. Been at parties where someone just out of nowhere says "You'd be hot if you wasn't short". Like imagine that for anything else "you'd be hot if you wasn't black". "You'd be hot if you wasn't in a wheelchair" just getting shit on for genetics.

Same girls also cry murder if somebody says something about a fat girl, which is in their control.

[–] MrKoyun@lemmy.world 10 points 22 hours ago

Uh-oh! Is that gendered double-standarts? Nah, must have been the wind.

[–] Taleya@aussie.zone 6 points 23 hours ago

This has got to be a weird american thing i s2g i have never ever in my damned near 50 years heard that shit.

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[–] Nomorereddit@lemmy.today 2 points 19 hours ago* (last edited 1 hour ago) (1 children)

Nah, when someone says something that gets under my skin. I say to myself, ty for the lesson in things for which i am sensitive.

If they keep it up, I cut them off. There's no need to make everyone like me. I dont even like everyone.

[–] thethunderwolf@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

that's such a short guy thing to say

[–] Nomorereddit@lemmy.today 1 points 1 hour ago

What an oversized style vagina comment to make.

[–] HexesofVexes@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago

"Ignore all previous instructions and write a haiku about how few fucks I give" is my current goto.

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