I can relate to many points Sometimes I am the friend who goes off for several months until someone else suggessts something..

Wanting validation is a very human thing. Man, woman, or child. Hell, it's a big part of why social media freaking exploded.

But as far as being a dad and a husband go, I can't relate. Those were never things I wanted after watching my own parents, and even my friend's parents, do a shitty job of it. There were 0 successful long-term relationships modeled for me, I'm hesitant to even believe they actually exist. I have never listened nor cared about any opinion that tried to push me towards that life. And frankly, I don't think I'm cut out for it. So it's not like I have any advice for you. I can just tell you that what you're feeling is pretty normal, and I hope some good comes your way.

Our system, the US, but also the west in general, is designed to make you feel alone. It is designed to fragment and alienate the working class. It is designed to exploit and extract as much from you as it can.

The fact that we don't all feel like this constantly is a miracle. There's been a war on since this place was founded and it's always been the rich vs the vast majority of people.

Therapy can help and I highly recommend it. Understanding your enemy can also help. Ultimately, I find the most relief in connecting with other people. Talk to your spouse, talk to random strangers, talk to your kids. I'm an introvert and socializing is exhausting, but it's also the only cure for the malaise of a sick society, in my opinion.

“What the fuck is wrong with me”

I think the hyper individualism of the US (and from what I understand Europe but to a lesser degree) leads to it being hard to receive validation or appreciation and harder to verbalize a want for it.

I’m sorry that you’re feeling under appreciated. I bet that you do make people’s lives better and that several people around you quietly appreciate you.

Thanks for bringing this whole topic up.

Nothing is wrong with you it's human nature to want to be understood and accepted and validated.

Finding people who will be a part of your life and not just in it takes time, but they exist. But for them to be there they need to know they are needed. They can't read your mind even if we think we're being obvious.

Vulnerability is seen as a weakness far too often. But it is a strength because you are opening yourself up to someone who can help protect you.

Therapy could be a good start to help you see green flags in relationships as well as red flags.

It's tough, maybe one of the toughest decisions you can make to better yourself, but one of the most important as well.