Memes

The inexorable rise of identity condiments has led to hard times for the most American of foodstuffs. And that’s a shame.

My son Jake, who’s 25, eats mayo. He’s a practical young man who works in computers and adores macaroni salad. He’s a good son. I also have a daughter. She was a women’s and gender studies major in college. Naturally, she loathes mayonnaise.

newer generations are refusing to meekly fall in line with a culinary heritage that never was theirs. Instead, they’re gobbling up kefir and ajvar and chimichurri and gochujang again.

Red Robin launched a vegan burger. You don’t put mayo on a vegan burger.

McDonald’s has debuted a Signature Sriracha Burger, joining KFC, Wendy’s, and Subway in signing on to the sizzling Thai sauce’s moment in the sun. You didn’t see Huy Fong Foods start a schmear campaign against the cultural appropriation of that.

Some experts say the dislike springs from the fact that mayo jiggles. [...] This is bullshit. This attitude comes to you from young people who willingly slurp down eight kazillion kinds of yogurt, not to mention raw fish and pork belly and, yo, detergent pods, so don’t talk to me about mayonnaise. The only reason for this raging mayophobia is a generation’s gut-level renouncement of the Greatest Generation’s condiment of choice.

Besides, I’ve got news: That aioli you’re all so fond of? I hate to break it to you, but that’s just mayonnaise.

Sandy Hingston sounds mad.

Also what? Mayo is still super popular, so what is she even on about? Is she hamming this up because she feels like this is what's necessary to make it in journalism these days?