this post was submitted on 03 Jun 2026
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me_irl
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Except that when a man puts in effort, he's suddenly labeled a misogynistic creep...
Plenty of others' experiences prove this statement to be false.
Don't heed the 'us vs them' rhetoric—it will only harm yourself. Do your thing, living your life, and put in the effort required when opportunity presents itself.
And don't be a creep—it's not hard.
If you want tips or feedback, just ask.
Conversely, plenty of others' experience prove it to be true. That's the thing about overgeneralizing experience. You end up ignoring the margins.
I'm not the one falling for "us vs. them," but I've certainly had that rhetoric weaponized against me enough to know what's happening.
The whole "man vs. bear" discussion is "us vs. them" rhetoric, but for some reason everyone wants to pretend they have amnesia when someone says women tend to treat men as if they're dangerous by default.
It's kinda hard to just "not be a creep" when anyone who sees me for the first time is just going to leap to the assumption that I'm a danger to them. Like, okay, let me just vacate the area for your comfort. I didn't actually need groceries, right? Why would that be the reason I'm at the grocery store?
Face it dude, society makes biased assumptions about men. Maybe you have attractiveness privilege or coolness privilege or accepted-by-your-peers privilege, but when you have no friends or social skills to speak of then the world treats you different. And just because you've never experienced that doesn't mean other people don't struggle with it.
...No? You made an absolute statement, which is verifiably false.
Also love the assumptions you're making about me lmao
As a man, it's this simple: Either you are the exception to the rule and it doesn't apply to you, or you need to do some serious introspection. Pick one.
I, personally, am not a danger to women.
What say you?
I said men have experienced this pattern. That's not an absolute statement, but you claiming that it never happens is.
I'm not making assumptions, you revealed it yourself.
I'm not a danger to women either, but that doesn't stop women from thinking I might be. The whole point of the man vs. bear thing is that women can't exactly know whether man is dangerous just by looking at him. That's true, but I disagree with the apparent conclusion that people tend to draw from it, which is to assume every man is dangerous by default. In what other situation is it ever okay to make sweeping, prejudicial assumptions about an entire category of people based on an overgeneralization?
If you don't think that's a thing that happens, then apparently you didn't pay much attention to the discourse, so I wonder how much actual introspection and listening to women you even do...