this post was submitted on 29 Sep 2025
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[–] N0t_5ure@lemmy.world 107 points 2 months ago (6 children)
[–] MeatPilot@lemmy.world 35 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

Yup, when you don't have a functional parent or adult around you learn to do a lot on your own.

Then when you're actually an adult you appear weird to everyone because you're so independent it's off-putting to people who grew up with social support.

You also get to develop some trust issues because the people who are typically there to rely on as a child were unreliable.

But everyone comes out the other end different and you realize how important those formative years are.

[–] Whats_your_reasoning@lemmy.world 11 points 2 months ago (1 children)

My old manager: You have to say something when you need help. I'm not a mind-reader.

My mom, when all I did was mention that I can't find an affordable place to live: Sorry, can't help.

I didn't ask for help and had zero intentions of asking for it (because I know her), just keeping her in the loop (which she claims to want), and she pre-emptively makes sure I know I can't rely on her.

These are two very different people who would both claim to want to "support" me, coming at it from the perspective of someone who thinks everyone has a supportive environment (manager) and the perspective of the person who gave me trust issues in the first place (mom.)

It must be nice to feel like there's always someone out there who will help you solve your problems. I've had to solve everything myself, or else suffer (and then be called "lazy" or "irresponsible" for being unable to do a particular thing, as if the millions of other things I manage to do alone count for nothing.)

[–] N0t_5ure@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago

I think we must have had the same mother.

[–] moosetwin@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 2 months ago

I'm not sure that's much of a surprise

[–] village604@adultswim.fan 7 points 2 months ago

I think it can also be an autism thing too. My SO is on the spectrum, and I'm definitely ADHD but possibly auDHD, and we were both mature for our age. We've always gotten along better with people older than us, especially adults when we were kids.

The biggest trauma I had was my parents getting divorced, but I was always mature for my age.

[–] MehBlah@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago

I commented above before I saw this. I was always told I was very mature for my age. I though knew if anyone complained about me. My parents would take turns breaking a belt on me when we got home.

[–] bridgeenjoyer@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 months ago

Thats be me!

Though mine wasn't bad compared to others. Also I just love old thing so thats how I've always been .

Although I find old things offer an escape. So thats why I like them.

[–] jubilationtcornpone@sh.itjust.works 28 points 2 months ago (1 children)

My Physical Age: 36

My Soul Age: 98 and about 2 days away from a fatal aneurysm.

[–] Hegar@fedia.io 19 points 2 months ago

When it was said to me I always felt like it meant, "wow, you've already identified that [this thing adults do] is a bunch of bullshit"

[–] MadMadBunny@lemmy.ca 14 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Sure it wasn’t because you already had to deal with too much abuse and shit?

Why do you think my serotonin receptors died?

[–] Obi@sopuli.xyz 9 points 2 months ago

Cue lifetime of self medication.

[–] Entertainmeonly@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Old soul just means you've had to come back more than most. Not a compliment.

[–] porksnort@slrpnk.net 1 points 2 months ago

Remedial soul

[–] MehBlah@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago

Or, you are the product of ongoing abuse who would rather not do anything to get a beating when you get home.

[–] QueenHawlSera@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 months ago (5 children)
[–] seliaste@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Neurotransmitter people think makes you happy but it's way more complex than that

[–] technocrit@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

people think makes you happy

without evidence.

[–] agentshags@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Or dopamine, or norepinephrine lol. I'm trying to fix mine but I think all 3 were almost on E

[–] Goretantath@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago

The thing i have to take a pill to have enough of, literally taking fucking happy pills because i grew wise to the world at the age of 6..

[–] Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 months ago

It was a drug people did in the 90s.

[–] technocrit@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 2 months ago

It's yet another psychiatric/pharmaceutical grift.

https://www.nature.com/articles/s41380-022-01661-0

[–] Sam_Bass@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago

Serotonin is created in the gut. No guts no glory

[–] vzqq@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 2 months ago

Really? I always clocked it as grooming bullshit.

[–] Bonus@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 months ago

Old Curmudgeon Soul

[–] technocrit@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 2 months ago